How long do you carry the past with you? Do you still remember your first quarrel with your spouse every time you have a misunderstanding? Do you still remember the penalty shot that your son’s friend missed that cost your team the soccer game 10 years ago? Are you still fuming at your ex five years after she ran off with another man? Are you living attached to your past negative experiences? Here are 3 ways you can detach from your past negative experiences and thrive.
The first way to detach yourself from your past negative experiences is to avoid rehashing your past painful, experiences. While it is important to learn from your past experience, making yourself suffer for years from a past experience is your own doing. You have to do certain things to continue to feel bad about experiences that happened years ago. It’s definitely a skill, just not a productive one.
When you spend time playing a negative experience over and over in your mind, you take away the time and energy you could have used to plan for the future and take action to meet your goals. For example if your goal is to lose 20 pounds and keep it off, but you have now acquired a taste for ethnic food from your friend, don’t keep blaming your friend for your failure to lose weight. Why? You have to take responsibility for the choices and decisions you make today. You have to remember that the more mental energy you give to the past, the more it impacts the remainder of your life.
The second way to detach yourself from past negative experiences is to create new memories. An effective way to unseat old memories is to create new memories. If you want to get over your ex, find someone new that is fabulous and smashing in spirit and truth. Focus on self-mastery and relentless improvement. Look at every new interaction as an opportunity for learning and growth. Don’t be in a hurry to condemn and dismiss others. Use the present to create new memories that are so strong and positive that they drive out the negative memories.
The third way is to make plans for the future. Have something exciting ahead of you that prevents you from looking behind. You can’t drive your car by looking at the rear view mirror. A great future can be the best medicine for a messy past. Do you have an actionable weekly plan for translating your dreams and goals into reality? If you don’t, develop one and stick to it. You also need to have the mindfulness to avoid daily distractions and stay focused on making the most out of the present moment. This is part of the process of self-mastery and relentless improvement nd empowerment.
Subscribe to the newsletter news
We hate SPAM and promise to keep your email address safe